Rabbi at the Races

A rabbi and a priest...

A young and immoderate Jewish rabbi was at the races playing the ponies, but losing his shirt. He noticed a Priest step out onto the track and blessed the forehead of one of the horses lining up for the 4th race. Lo and behold, that horse, a long shot – won the race!

Next race, as the horses lined up, the Priest stepped onto the track. Sure enough, he blessed one of the horses.

The rabbi made a beeline for a betting window and placed a small bet on the horse. Again, even though it was another long shot, the horse won the race.

Sababa!”, he shouted and ran to the payout window.

He collected his winnings and anxiously waited to see which horse the Priest would bless next. He bet big on it, and it won. As the races continued the Priest kept blessing horses, and each one ended up winning.

The rabbi was elated. He made a quick dash to the ATM, withdrew all his savings, and awaited for the Priest’s blessing that would tell him which horse to bet on.

True to his pattern, the Priest stepped onto the track for the last race and blessed the forehead of an old nag that was 100/1. This time the priest blessed the eyes, ears, and hooves of the old nag. The rabbi knew he had a winner and bet every cent he owned on the old nag.

He watched dumbfounded as the old nag pulled up and collapsed 3 yards from the gate.

“Oy lo!” In a state of shock, he went to the track area where the Priest was.

Confronting him, he demanded, ‘Father! What happened? All-day long you blessed horses and they all won. Then in the last race, the horse you blessed never even had a chance. Now, thanks to you I’ve lost every cent of my savings!’.

The Priest placed a calming hand on the young rabbi’s shoulder, nodded wisely and asked, “I take it you are not Catholic, are you my son?”

“No, sir, I’m Jewish”

“Ahhhh…. that’s the problem”, said the Priest sadly shaking his head, “you couldn’t tell the difference between a blessing and last rites.”

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